WARNING: Today’s topic continues with the aftermath of a story involving rape and abuse. We want to make sure you are well cared for, so if you have struggled with these things, please proceed with caution. If you are triggered in any way, or realize you need more help, you may reach out to a pastor at your local campus, or call the Sexual Assault Hotline at 800.656.4673. 2 Samuel 13:15-22 15 Then suddenly Amnon’s love turned to hate, and he hated her even more than he had loved her. “Get out of here” he snarled at her. 16 “No, no” Tamar cried. “Sending me away now is worse than what you’ve already done to me.” But Amnon wouldn’t listen to her. 17 He shouted for his servant and demanded, “Throw this woman out, and lock the door behind her” 18 So the servant put her out and locked the door behind her. She was wearing a long, beautiful robe, as was the custom in those days for the king’s virgin daughters. 19 But now Tamar tore her robe and put ashes on her head. And then, with her face in her hands, she went away crying. 20 Her brother Absalom saw her and asked, “Is it true that Amnon has been with you? Well, my sister, keep quiet for now, since he’s your brother. Don’t you worry about it.” So Tamar lived as a desolate woman in her brother Absalom’s house. 21 When King David heard what had happened, he was very angry. 22 And though Absalom never spoke to Amnon about this, he hated Amnon deeply because of what he had done to his sister. First of all, I recognize that I am a man and can’t possibly fathom what all Tamar went through in this story, but I can tell you it breaks my heart and causes me to feel sick inside (and I do recognize that men can experience rape and sexual assault too, and I in no way want to suggest otherwise). These sick feelings are yet another reminder that these are the stories we were never meant to experience or hear...  Read More

WARNING: Today’s topic specifically deals with rape and abuse. Again, if you have struggled with these things, please proceed with caution. If you are triggered in any way, or realize you need more help, you may reach out to a pastor at your local campus, or call the Sexual Assault Hotline at 800.656.4673. 2 Samuel 13:8-14 8 When Tamar arrived at Amnon’s house, she went to the place where he was lying down so he could watch her mix some dough. Then she baked his favorite dish for him. 9 But when she set the serving tray before him, he refused to eat. “Everyone get out of here,” Amnon told his servants. So they all left. 10 Then he said to Tamar, “Now bring the food into my bedroom and feed it to me here.” So Tamar took his favorite dish to him. 11 But as she was feeding him, he grabbed her and demanded, “Come to bed with me, my darling sister.” 12 “No, my brother” she cried. “Don’t be foolish Don’t do this to me Such wicked things aren’t done in Israel. 13 Where could I go in my shame? And you would be called one of the greatest fools in Israel. Please, just speak to the king about it, and he will let you marry me.” 14 But Amnon wouldn’t listen to her, and since he was stronger than she was, he raped her. Talk about a gut punch. I hate reading this story and I really hate the horror of those last three words in verse 14. All I can think is, these kinds of things were never supposed to be a part of our story...  Read More

WARNING: This week’s topic will introduce acts of rape and abuse by family members. If you have struggled with these things, please proceed with caution. If you are triggered in any way, or realize you need more help, you may reach out to a pastor at your local campus, or call the Sexual Assault Hotline at 800.656.4673. Life is messy, broken, complicated, and painful. This world is not the one God designed for us back in the Garden of Eden. And though there is beauty to celebrate, there is also evil that will one day be eradicated. Whatever we have experienced or are experienced or will experience, part of the hope we share with one another is in the coming day when God Himself will announce, “[God] will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.” (Revelation 21:4, NIV) I mentioned him in week one, but I love the importance Eddie Jacku, WWII holocaust survivor, puts on hope. He says, “Hope costs us nothing, but it changes everything.” So I put my hope in Jesus, His resurrection, and in where I know our story is going even through our darkest times. And that line from Revelation 21:4, know that it’s what God wants. That’s what He’s working towards. In the meantime, we have some pretty awful stuff that was never a part of His plan for us, that we have to navigate on this earth from time to time because of evil...  Read More

The following is a guide to help facilitate discussion between you and the person you’re studying with or with your Connect Group. Feel free to add, subtract, or change questions to fit the conversation, and pray for the Spirit to lead in all things. This content may be difficult for some in your group to process together. Be sure to let your group know the topic before you meet, and give permission to anyone to bow out if they are concerned about being triggered, or who simply don’t want to talk through this particular story.  Read More

2 Samuel 12:7, 11-13 Then Nathan said to David, “You are that man" “This is what the LORD says: Because of what you have done, I will cause your own household to rebel against you. I will give your wives to another man before your very eyes, and he will go to bed with them in public view. You did it secretly, but I will make this happen to you openly in the sight of all Israel.” Then David confessed to Nathan, “I have sinned against the LORD.” Psalm 51:16-19 You do not desire a sacrifice, or I would offer one. You do not want a burnt offering. The sacrifice you desire is a broken spirit. You will not reject a broken and repentant heart, O God. Look with favor on Zion and help her; rebuild the walls of Jerusalem. Then you will be pleased with sacrifices offered in the right spirit— with burnt offerings and whole burnt offerings. Then bulls will again be sacrificed on your altar. Before we move on from these troubling passages, there’s one more point to consider. The pages of scripture show that it is unrealistic to believe forgiveness and acceptance conveniently eliminate consequences. Engaging in sinful behavior threatens our relationship with God. Not because He will eventually forsake us or be unwilling to forgive, but because sin subtly drives us far enough away from salvation that we would no longer reach for the hand of Jesus. The Bible suggests that God won’t give up on us before we give up on Him. Our sins lead us to reject God, rather than the other way around...  Read More

2 Samuel 12:5-10 David was furious. “As surely as the LORD lives,” he vowed, “any man who would do such a thing deserves to die! He must repay four lambs to the poor man for the one he stole and for having no pity.” Then Nathan said to David, “You are that man! The LORD, the God of Israel, says: I anointed you king of Israel and saved you from the power of Saul. I gave you your master’s house and his wives and the kingdoms of Israel and Judah. And if that had not been enough, I would have given you much, much more. Why, then, have you despised the word of the LORD and done this horrible deed? For you have murdered Uriah the Hittite with the sword of the Ammonites and stolen his wife. From this time on, your family will live by the sword because you have despised me by taking Uriah’s wife to be your own. Psalm 51:12-15 Restore to me the joy of your salvation, and make me willing to obey you. Then I will teach your ways to rebels, and they will return to you. Forgive me for shedding blood, O God who saves; then I will joyfully sing of your forgiveness. Unseal my lips, O Lord, that my mouth may praise you. We’ve reached a point in our story where David is overwhelmed with guilt. He has taken what isn’t his, betrayed his family, ruined neighbors’ lives, shed innocent blood, and become a cautionary tale of power and entitlement. Tomorrow’s lesson will examine the consequences of wrongful actions that are never completely avoided, no matter how much we repent. But today, we see the grace and salvation Jesus offers to everyone who confesses. Before we go further, I have to admit that part of me feels relieved to read this story. Some Christians jump between Biblical success stories, skipping the troubling ones, in a way that makes following God seem impossible. In contrast, between the stories of Moses crossing the Red Sea, David slaying Goliath, and Peter preaching the resurrected Christ, we have opportunity to read about their failures and flaws, allowing space for me to follow Jesus despite my imperfections.  Read More